Identifying or recognizing if your partner is contented emotionally within Marriage is quite tricky; therefore, you need to take detail on the small things going around.
You might constantly watch your partner expressing uncommon behaviour or discover suspicious treatment from him or her. Then it is time to start assuming your partner has a strange fantasy about other people you might know or not know.
A study shows that 98% of men and women had fantasies outside their committed relationships, mostly sexual ones.
Shazia Saleem (master in Psychology), specialising in divorce and separation counselling, says when a married couple thinks about someone all the time despite the committed relationship can be a sure sign of emotional infidelity.
"When someone is constantly on your mind, and you are happily married but happily fantasize about someone else, it may mean you are not satisfied with your current relationship, or it could mean you are looking to have your cake and eat it too," Saleem says.
Partners experiencing fantasies are found to be mentally absent and engaged in emotionally abusing their partner. They appear to be emotionally absent whenever you try to share your thoughts. Instead of having emotional intimacy and companionship, your relationship will lack emotional closeness.
As a norm, Marriage is based on sharing life experiences with one another. Meanwhile, the relationship's success is built on physical intimacy and solid emotional bonds. Relationship experts believe that here is where the problems begin in Marriage.
Most often, when a woman or man feels neglected or withdrawn from connection and begins to withhold communications and intimacy, it could be a subtle sign of absent-mindedness racked with fantasy thoughts towards someone else.
Suppose you are doubting whether your partner is feeling fantasy for someone. Here are the trivial signs to look at.
Mentioning other names
The book "The Diary of the Jones Bright" by Hellen Fielding mentioned a story about the 'mentionitis' when a partner kept mentioning another woman's name in the conversation. Since people tend to talk more about people in our minds, there is a high tendency that if a partner keeps mentioning other people's names might be a sign that they are fantasizing about someone else.
They seem lost in daydreams
A partner who is fantasizing about someone else is mentally and emotionally absent. They often laugh and smile at themselves, show lapses of attention, and so forth.
Their words reflect much on fantasies
If you take care of the words they choose to use, you will understand their inner feelings and thoughts because words reflect an unsaid mind. Of course, what they say will include fantasies, but they will not include you. For instance, they would speak words such as "God, I wish I would be on the yacht like Titanic enjoying with someone on my side" Even if they are not mentioning any name, it is a sign they are fantasizing about someone.
They resist you
When a partner is fantasizing about someone else, according to Shazia, they will pretend to listen and be curious, but they are not. They'll get upset when a partner repeats themselves or tries to ensure they are listening.
They are constantly tied
If your partner is constantly worried and thinking and more exhausted, chances are they are emotionally drained because of fantasies. "They will tramp you with excuses for 'tiredness' and hectic work throughout the day. They might tell you a lot is going on at work and that they are not sleeping well, but in truth, they are worried about their fantasies and how they should handle it or ignore it," said Shazia.
Forgetting important dates
Our minds get too busy with other things, and that's normal. However, relationship experts believe forgetting essential things about our lovers, like forgetting things related to dinner and dates, is a sure sign their focus is obviously somewhere else.
Defensive about future plans
Partners whose minds are fantasizing are always disclosed when asked about their following schedules and plans because they know they will spend the day daydreaming about someone or meeting in secret, so if they are asked about their plans, they might become defensive about it.